Wednesday September 22, 2010
Dear Family,
It is crazy but my time here at the MTC is almost over. I leave on tuesday to the great Montana. Really I am nervous because I don't really feel that ready. I mean I have learned a lot while I have been here but it doesn't feel like I have learned enough. The classes are all amazing and our teachers are the best.The Spirit here is so amazing and everyday I feel so inspired.
Of course it isn't always easy and somedays I really do question if I can really do this. One day after a TE I just felt horrible. I felt like the teacher was attacking me and that I was a bad missionary. After the TE Sister Mace and I went to a bench outside and I just started to cry. As we sat there another sister missionary walked up and asked if everything was ok. I told her how I was feeling and then she shared the most wonderful message with me. She told me that if I wasn't meant to be here that the Lord wouldn't have called me. He knows I can do this and I need to just put my trust in him. Then she shared with me that her whole family are converts and if it hadn't been for the elders she wouldn't have learned about the gospel and that me being a missionary I would be able to help so many families come unto Christ. She also reminded me not to focus on myself too much and my weaknesses but to think about those I am about to go teach and to trust in the Lord. Finally she shared with my three scriptures. The one that really helped me was Ether 12:27 which says, "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness taht they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong." That scripture really has helped me because the Lord will make my weak things strong if I put my trust and faith in Him.
On a happier note I love our TRC's. In them we have an opportunity to actually teach. What it is is a member comes and acts like an investigator but they do it so well that you really wouldn't know that they are members. They are kind of hard because I get nervous but they have really allowed me to feel the love that God has for all His children. Everytime I go in there I just want to help those that we teach so much. I want them to accept the gospel because I know how much it will bless them in their lives. I honestly can say that I really do love them and I want what is best for them.
Today we get to go to the temple and am so excited. The temple has always been a place of peace for me and my soul craves the spirit that is there.
The missionaries here are so wonderful even the elders. The elders just have a certain spirit about them and you can really see the love they have for the gospel. Yes sometimes they are just 19 year old boys but for the most part you can tell that they are servants of the Lord. Their testimonies are so strong and I can truly testify that they are called of God.
The Lord has blessed me so much while I have been here and I am so greatful for this experience. I have learned so much and the most important thing I have learned is to grow closer to the Lord so that I can have a better connection with the Holy Spirit. I know that if we truly ask the Lord anything in faith that He will really give us the answer. It may not be right after you pray but He will answer. Most of my prayers are answered by other people when the are sharing their testimonies to me. We truly have angels all around us and it just reminds me of how much the Lord loves and cares for each one of us.
Keep me and all the other missionaries in your prayers and look for opportunities where you can be a missionary yourself.
Love
Sister Jense
